“Look-it, Mom!” The words sang through the ajar front door. Louisa had something exciting for me to see. Out of habit, I jumped up, though still in my nightgown, and ran out into the front yard to see a big Oriental Poppy just bursting forth from its pod, the brilliant orange tissue petals unfolding. That was worth seeing, as is every other “look it, Mom” that comes my way.
When I returned to the house, my oldest daughter Julianna questioned me, “Mom, why do you always jump right up and go see what the kids want to show you?” I thought back to the days when I started that habit. My, it has been nearly 30 years of “jumping up”!
One day, while bending over my little one’s latest enchantment, and seeing the thrill in his baby eyes, I thought about the future. I thought about how quickly those baby delights are set aside for little boy interests, and how suddenly little boys turn into big boys and big boys turn into men. I determined then and there that I didn’t want to miss a single one of those “Look-it, Mama” calls. Not a one. So I promised myself to get up, to jump up happily with a smile on my face, and see the world’s discoveries through the shining eyes of my child. And to consider it a privilege that my child wants to share his sweetest enjoyments with his beloved mama.
Nowadays, the “Look-it, Mama” calls come much less often, as my seven children are growing, growing . . . gone. Well, perhaps the grown children have turned to more mature requests for my attention, as they still want to talk to me about their discoveries and accomplishments. Thank goodness I still have Louisa calling “Look-it, Mom”—giving me the privilege of “jumping up” to share her delight and seeing the world anew through the eyes of a child.
Now, I don’t want to induce guilt. I’ve moaned many a time, “Honey, bring it to Mom to see!” (that never works, by the way) or “I’m too tired” (which becomes their parroted answer back to you when you make a request of them, unfortunately). I haven’t always jumped up. But, all in all, I think if a mom is available, it makes a huge difference in her child’s life.
I also don’t want you to feel that a mother must be at her child’s whimsical beck-and-call. But there is a magic in “jumping up”. For all that effort, I think those “jump-up’s” pay back a hundred-fold. I believe that choosing to get up cheerfully is an act of love. It firmly impresses upon our children’s minds that they are the most important work we could ever do, the most precious people in our lives. They can see that sharing their lives and experiences is our priority. Maybe that is why we become their best childhood friends. Maybe that is why they still want to share their joys and accomplishments with us, when they are grown.
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I'd sure love to hear your comment!
Great Reminder….Thank you!
I try my best to be a "jump up" mom. I love to see what my kiddos have discovered or created (just as I was writing this sentence my 3yr old pulled me away to see her "secret hideout" she made in her room). They grow so so quickly and I feel greater JOY when I take the time to build memories with them. I also find it important to DISPLAY all of their art work, even if just for the day. We have been trying to utilize the camera more, especially for the creations that need to be put away. It can be hard to answer the "look what I did (found)!" call, but it is worth it. Another area I need to improve on is LISTENING. Sometimes one of my Kiddos will be wanting to tell me something and I don't STOP what I am focused on so that I can LISTEN. In return I usually get children who do not LISTEN to me. Happy Day!
Thanks for the big hug—I needed that! And I am so so glad you traded your 3 clean spoons for the joy on your little one's face. Good decision!
Diane,
I just wanted to let you know how this blog changed my lazy self! I was the mom who would grumble, "Oh, not now Sweetie" or "Just a minute" and then continue on with my "important" mommy work. I have 9 kids and the hardest part for me of raising a large family is the constant interruptions. I'm a natural born do-er. Reading this blog pierced right through me and I decided to go happily every time my kids excitedly say, "Come here, Mom!" What a difference it has made! One of my 3yr old twins just came in while I was doing dishes and said just that. I only had three more spoons to wash and was tempted to say "just a minute" but I dropped the rag and went with her. The neighbor boy had a large bubble wand and she wanted to show me how they were all jumping and popping tons of bubbles. The delight on her face was such a precious joy-and to think I would have missed that moment for 3 clean spoons!! How foolish we are so often, and how much deep joy we miss due to the lesser things and the "tyranny of the urgent." Thank you for teaching such an important life lesson–sending you a big hug!!
Hi Diane, I also loved your post and it has inspired me to be more available too. I have always felt that appreciating the beauty in nature is particularly important in helping our children to connect with God. So it has always been my endeavour and with your encouragement will continue to be my endeavour to especially respond to the call to look at the strange little bugs or the new weed growing in the lawn that they have just discovered. I want to convey a sense of wonderment and excitement for learning in my children and the 'jump up mother' is an important part in facilitating that. Thanks for encouraging me to stay mindful and these things and to not slip into my lazy ways. (Plus, I can always do with the extra exercise! lol )
I know, it is hard to do. I guess that is why I felt a personal challenge to be a "jump-up mother". There are ALWAYS important things to keep you from responding to them. But, really, it only takes a little moment and some praise. If you timed it on a stopwatch, I doubt it would take more than 3 minutes to get up and see their lego creation and get back to making dinner. We have other distractions (like phone calls) that interrupt dinner-making and we carry on. I didn't interrupt a nursing baby, but did try to follow-through just as soon as the baby was done eating. And I didn't always "jump-up", of course, but that was my goal. Even trying a little will make your kids much happier!
Dear Diane, Thank you for sharing this one again. It's one of my favorites! It has changed what I do, and I'm so thankful. I'm forwarding it to my friends. Love, Beth
You are so right about this. Now I see the same thing has passed on to my grandchildren through my children. And I agree I wouldn't have missed it for the world through the eyes of my children. They teach us so much when we take the time to be still and look and listen in our hurried world. It did however take a while to teach my son that it was better for the critters to stay outside with their own family so they wouldn't get lonely or sad and miss their mommy. Taking time to see the world through my childrens eyes taught me a lot. Now as I am seeing/learning through my grandchildrens eyes, I can see that I am truly blessed. Hope you have a blessed Mothers Day.
Hello Diane,
"The Jump Up Mom" is just beautiful. You have a way of writing that is so sweet and simply put, yet full of wisdom. This is the way I like to hope that I have been parenting. With children spread apart in age, it is painfully clear how fast time goes. I often pray that God will let me keep certain special memories of the children for when I am older, real memories, more than just a photograph. It was sweet to read about hoping that they come back to us for some attention when they get older too. I will pray for that for me and for you too!
I love this post! I realized how often I answer "hang on a minute" when my boys want to show me something recently and was so convicted to stop doing that. I too want to enjoy the moments they want to share with me and not waste a one! Thanks for the reminder and the encouragement!
This one is a sweet and pleasant reminder, coming my way when
my "jumper" is feeling a bit tired. Thank you, dear friend.
I also wanted to thank you for a book review awhile back that lead me to the Gene Stratton Porter books. "Laddie" being the first that I have
read. I felt that I was lead to a great treasure in these books! My heart has been so touched by that book, and I really thank you. I've
bought another one, "The Magic Garden", since I'm nearly finished with
"Laddie".
Your posts are a refreshing message of encouragement.
Rhonda
I realize that I am not jumping up the way I want to or ought to–the way you described in this post. But I am nursing the baby or reading with another child or getting dinner ready on time because Daddy works nights and if we don't have dinner at a certain time we don't get to have dinner with him . . . there are so many times that I feel I cannot "jump up." How–how–did you train yourself into that habit? How did you make it work? How did you do it at all?