Never Reward Negative Behavior


boy-504326_1280One of the most important lessons that I ever learned is: “Never reward negative behavior!” That one line can make a world of difference in your family life. It is so simple, really!

Think of the little boy in the shopping cart seat who is whining, whining for candy. We’ve all seen it (and maybe lived it too!) The little guy is working up to a pitch, and his exasperated mother is getting frustrated. Next scene, the little boy is happily licking an ice cream cone. What lesson was just taught? “If I whine loud and long enough, I’ll get a treat!” You can bet that behavior will be repeated every time they go to the grocery store!

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Why Listen?


“Pick up your shoes!”

“Clear the table!”

“You’ve left your coat on the couch.”

“Don’t leave a wet towel on your bedroom floor!”

Sound familiar? I sometimes feel like I am a repeating public announcement: “Keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle until it comes to a complete stop” . . . “No smoking in the terminal”.

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Big Bear Hugs

My very sweet grandbabies: Abigial and Rebekah and their new baby brother Isaac

My very sweet grandbabies: Abigial and Rebekah and their new baby brother Isaac

We all need physical touch! It is essential to our well-being, just as much as good food and sleep and other components of health. Research has shown that monkeys will choose physical contact over food, if they are being “touch-deprived”. In another study, babies in overcrowded orphanages had a greater chance of survival if their cribs were near the doorway where workers might pat them as they passed. Touch is critical to our well-being.

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What to Do with a Restless Little Boy?

I find it a rather interesting fact that 80% of all homeschooled children are boys. That makes a definite statement about the inability of most little boys to sit in desks and endure the regimentation of public school. Little boys are wiggles and adventure. Sitting in a desk for hours on end sounds like cruel and unusual punishment to an energetic little man.

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Zoned Out Kids

homeschooling-tea partyQuestion:

I am at wit’s end with my daughter. I tell her, remind her, nag her, coax her and still she will not do what I ask. I don’t want to punish her all the time. She seems to turn a deaf ear to me. It is very hard to homeschool when she zones me out. Please help!


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Spanking, Anyone?

Me & My Grandbabies

Me & My Grandbabies


Tell me why you prefer not to spank. I’m just curious why? Isn’t it a scriptural command to parents to spank? (Biblical chastisement)



Basically, I don’t spank because the only time I feel enough anger to spank my child is when I am out of control emotionally. When I feel myself re-gaining control, I have no desire to hit or hurt anyone. So, I realize that the passion I feel that makes me want to spank comes from a source other than God. Self-control is the hallmark of a Christian.

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Wonderful, Wonderful Chores!

cleaning-268126_1280Not too many people like the word “chores”, but oh, they can be wonderful! They are the best teacher you’ll ever find! They teach a host of skills and virtues such as self-control, “stick-to-it”-ness, joy in accomplishment, problem-solving, perseverance, and the work ethic. Plus, they lighten many a tired mom’s load.

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More Flies with Honey


“You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar”, my mother used to say.

Grumble, grumble. I wanted to do it the easy way (by force)—not the right way (by persuasion)!

You can chase the animals all over the field trying to catch them, but rattle the feed bowl and they’ll come runnin’! I often think of this when trying to get a child to do a chore, to do their math, or complete some other less desirable task. How do I lace this job with honey? How do I get them to “come running”? That takes some creative thinking on mom’s part to keep homelife happy and pleasant.

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